On Saturday December 19th, my dad passed away. He had a massive heart-attack in his sleep. This past week has been quite difficult for my brothers and me. I spent the first part of the week in Rexburg/Rigby helping out with arrangements, and on Wednesday we held the funeral. In July we will have another memorial when we place the headstone, and spread his ashes.
My relationship with my father had been a hard one over the last few years. Most of you who read my blog know why, however, for those who don't, I'll put it simply...My dad made some rotten choices in his life, and didn't change his ways until the last few months. I hadn't spoken to, or seen my father in the last 2 years.
I wish that I could talk to him one last time, just to let him know that I forgive him, and I love him very much. I wish I wouldn't have held so much hate in my heart towards him, however, we all have our regrets, and mine are a lot smaller than his were. I was told how much he was changing the last few months before his death. He was finally sober, and looking to try and make things somewhat right.
I am proud of my father. That he finally realized things needed to change, and he was willing to try to do it. I'm very thankful that he was able to show so many people the new Victor.
Dad, I love you very much, and want you to know that I forgive you, and will always remember the good times we had as a family.
I read a poem at the funeral, and I would like to share it now.....
Not Good-bye, but see you later...
Dressed in the color black
Celebrating one's new Journey
Tears stream down my face
Burning from the sorrow
Of the words Good-bye.
Higher, higher, push me higher
On the swings we played
And hugs and kisses we shared.
Now at your grave
Knowing your not there
But standing beside me
Watching over me, waiting
Till the day we meet again.
So, Its not good-bye, but see you later.
As you walk away, I hear you say
"Sweet Dreams my Queenie"
And I say
"I love you Daddy, see you later."
I want to thank everyone for the thoughts and prayers that have been sent to my family. We all appreciate each and every one of them. This is a hard road to start on, after losing a loved one, however, as we have been told many times....It will get easier. And, we simply need to remember that we will see him again one day.
3 comments:
Beautifully said Vicky. Thank goodness we all have the opportunity to repent. I'm so glad he was on that road and had started to make amends for the hurt and anguish he had caused so many. Love you!
Thank you Aunt Julia. it is a true blessing that we have an opportunity to repent for our sins. Thank you for your kind words, and for standing up and speaking at the funeral. I love you very much, and hope we can get together sooner, rather than later.
Your Dad knows you forgive him, now forgive yourself. He wouldn't want you to feel badly. You will see him again one day and this earthly life won't matter. Take care and I love you.
Post a Comment